I’ve been a fan of Harry Connick Jr. for many years—musically speaking. There are a number of his classics on my playlist of love songs. It’s a special kind of mix of smooth and quirky and funky that most always has a musical depth that comes from his deep jazz roots.
One of my more recent favorites of his is a catchy little tune called “Like We Do.” (Check it out here.)
It’s a celebration of the uniqueness of a relationship. Consider this chorus:
Nobody got a you like me Nobody got this history And the good times, and the hard times And the wild time we've been through Nobody got a me like you And I ain't much but this much is true No one does "I do" like we do
I think we all tend to see things in the meaningful examples in our lives, good things and bad, and try to learn from if not directly implement some of the practices of those other relationships. But I love that Harry reminds us that his intention is not to say his marriage is better than mine or anyone else’s. He is simply celebrating with his beloved that theirs is one of a kind.
I feel that very deeply. I tend to think I have one of the strongest marriages I’ve ever seen but I’m usually pretty quick to point out that I believe it’s because of God’s grace alone as He has provided so many great examples and great encouragers and great tools to help us along the way. I don’t expect anyone to pattern their marriage after mine or compare theirs with ours.
We have our ways of dealing with struggles and keeping things centered and sharing the joys and pains of life together. We have our own unique way of doing “I do” together. I’m not suggesting ours is better. I’m just saying it is ours… and it’s a work in progress, a relationship still growing, refining, reforming.
One of the biggest dangers in our social media world is the nearly inescapable trap of comparison it draws us into. We all tend to post the most flattering things about our lives… and understandably so. But then we can hardly resist comparing our difficult and less flattering moments with the shiny representations of life that our acquaintances are posting.
In our more rational moments we recognize that it’s a trap. But the feelings and the comparison reflexes are beyond our rational minds. It plays on and feeds our insecurities.
If you are married or are considering marriage on the horizon, I want to remind you that God, in His infinite wisdom has plans for unique combinations of personalities that will reflect the uniqueness of His relationship with each of His people. He is infinitely creative and has made each of us more unique than the snowflakes. Be the unique version of “I do” that God made you to be.
And this is why I borrow Mr. Connick’s fun little groove. This wonder called marriage, this special “I do” that we do, is a great gift of God to celebrate.